Happenings of a 30-something spinster living in NYC, taking baths, and (maybe) going on dates
It’s been a weekend, mercy. I’m not going to hit all the details, but let’s just say Friday got interesting … and wild.
But now, I’m soaking in the tub, relaxing and washing away the sins. I’m moving this week and all my glasses are packed, so drinking wine straight from the bottle. Keeping up the class this weekend didn’t have.
Once again, screw the stats. Let’s just enjoy the night and what’s to come. After all, this may be my last bath in this apartment. Let’s hope the new tub is perfect. 🤞
Ugh. Second depression bath of 2023 underway. Things are all gloom around here so I’m trying to forget about it all for a moment.
Job search is blah. Apartment hunting is blah. And small fall bald dude from that holiday party messaged me Friday. Did I meet up with him? Yes. Should I have? Probably not. Was it worth the 8:30 am walk of shame in a faux-fur cropped leopard jacket? Most definitely not.
So here we are. Reflecting. Silence. Ready for therapy.
No tub stats tonight. Not feeling it. ✌️
Wrapping up another week with no job offer. Still going strong with those two companies but we shall see. Pretty sure the preppy one is going to ditch me. And after speaking with my therapist for an hour about them, I’m even more confused about what is best for my career. I’ve decided which one is the most fun / and my gut is leaning towards, but will people judge me because it’s a small company after leaving a massive conglomerate? Why do I even care???
So I took that confusing energy and responded immediately to a text from the British 28 year old who resurrected from Ghost Town. It was this past Sunday night, I was already tipsy at my apartment with friends, so it was the perfect scenario. He came over. Friends left. Zero effort fun.
But he did steal my panties. Now it could have been a mistake, but … they are gone. L. O. L. He’s leaving the US to go back to the UK full-time. Going away present?
Friday I attended a holiday party at a bar in my hood. I went full cute and everyone loved my Christmas tree skirt worn as a cape. So did a random bald and short king.
He lives a few blocks from my apartment in a VERY expensive and luxe apartment and building. Olympic-size lap pool, anyone? Let’s say the walk home the next morning was COMICAL as I was clutching my cape and homemade Christmas headband. I also had no sunglasses to hide my raccoon eyes. 😵💫
But it was, however, the start of SantaCon. But all the moms walking their babies and all the dudes carrying coffee with their girlfriends knew. They allllllll knew.
I think even the old man with the walker at my coffee shop.
Tub Stats
Evening. Tonight’s a big ol’ depression bath. Long weekend. (And not the good kind.) Long start to the week. And long fingernails that scratched my eye.
I had a fun weekend, but too much drinking and too little quiet me-time. This weekend is my birthday, so trying to recharge before then, but honestly just want to chill and maybe eat pasta.
I also am so fed up with men lately. No new ones want me. No good old ones want me. And too many taken men do.
So yeah, Depresso City
Tub Tracker Stats
Kinda confused as to what this bath is to be labeled. Self-care? Depression? Can it be both?
Feeling a little down today after a loooong few weeks of verrrrry low work days. Are things changing? Sure, but will it ever change anything? We’ll see, I guess.
So, obviously, had another marathon night of drinking and feeling all the things today. Including cramps! Wtf body, it’s no where near time for this and spotting. I haven’t bleed in almost a year but somehow today my uterus said “surprise Bitch.” 😩
So here we are, soaking in the tub high and just being. Last night I got so drunk I texted the old fling that now lives with his girlfriend. Not cool. I simply wrote “hi 🙃” but it was before 10pm. So at least that isn’t toooooo bad?! 🥴
He responded this morning and apologized for not answering sooner. I quickly apologized for texting and breaking our rules from our last convo months ago. I was doing so well!!!
He immediately wanted to know how my dating life was going and how I was. I told him dating has been blah and asked how he was. Dating his bestie still but misses having sex with other people.
I tried to divert and say it’s not all that great because I’ve had a lot of bad sex lately. He wanted details. But reader, you should applaud me because I said “no! We can’t have that type of relationship anymore!” Yay me respecting boundaries!!
The boy even wrote how his sex life was not that great (again). But you know what? Not my business. Growth, babbbbby!!
Tub Stats
We’re on a depression bath journey today. 🥲
Went out yesterday for a friends birthday and got far too drunk without any food. Our 3pm meetup turned in to me getting home almost 14 hours later. But like, who am I to turn down $29 bottles of rosé at happy hour?!
At some point during the night, my date from two weeks ago texted. We had a very solid first date; lots in common, he’s incredibly smart, etc etc etc. So when he texted asking how I’ve been, we somehow stumbled into meeting up.
Now, the first date’s rendezvous wasn’t all perfect. It had its moments, but ultimately fell flat between the sheets. But first time together, so maybe we just need to click, right??
Sad to say, I’m wrong. Last night was … bland. Not the worst, but certainly down there on the list.😩 Additionally, this was also my first time seeing his apartment. This man speaks 8 languages and went to TWO Ivy League schools. Two!!! So I had a lot built up in my mind as far as his living arrangements.
Readers, there were skid marks in the toilet. Crap all over the place. Kitchen worse than my depression dishes. And to top it off, an open can of pork and beans. 😐
After I saw all that, I still said “let’s do it” cause I went all the way to Brooklyn. But dear Reader, I didn’t stay all night. I simply could not.
I also let this man cuddle me. Twice!!! I do not EVER cuddle, and his were actually nice. I could see myself actually sleeping that way. And I NEVER ever had that feeling. What’s a girl to do with all this??
So here I am. Depression bath on a late Saturday afternoon, trying to pick up the pieces of yet another dating disaster.
Be well and god speed.
Tub Stats:
Boyyyy am I high and in the tub right now. Life’s been rolling and so have I. Several dates, a 28 year old, and a man that I might end up having some fun with. At least, I hope so.
Bath stats
Bath night. On the cusp of depression, but labeling this one self-care as I just spent $500 on discount designer clothes. But don’t worry, my Scoop for Walmart clothes also came in today. All about that balance, baby.
Lots of disappointments from men this week on the apps. Several have mentioned meeting and halfway set plans then ultimately dropped them all. Now I’m wanting to entertain the guy (who I now know lives with his girlfriend) who texted me nonstop this week at 3:30am. He also LinkedIn requested me at the same time. Boy was desperate and now I’m like … do I text him?
I’m not going to, don’t worry. I’ll swipe away for new attention, but dammit, now I want his.
Ugh. Swiping now. See ya ✌️
Tub Tracker Stats:
Sad to say, I’m not celebrating 4/20 this year. Got home from work very late and decided to eat a rushed dinner then head straight to the tub with wine.
Yep, I forgot the gummy. And now I’m in the tub and fully not getting out. Wine will have to do. I also fully intend to stay in here til bedtime and go straight from TikTok swiping in the tub to TikTok swiping to sleep. Missed opportunity.
Guess I’ll just have to celebrate tomorrow. And the day after that … and that … and that.
Tub Tracker Stats
It’s been a week and I’m finally settling in to the tub to reflect. High? Yes. Wine? You know it.
We’re making progress with the podcast, so stay tuned! Music has been selected, a few episodes have been recorded, art has been made, social secured, and we’re so close to launch!!
In the meantime, I went on a date last week. It was pretty lackluster and even he didn’t want to makeout with me. I was pulling out all the stops, even though I wasn’t attracted to him! But a makeout would have been nice, dude!! Needless to say we didn’t make plans to go forward.
So here we are, in the tub reflecting.
Tub Tracker stats:
the bad hag 